The love supreme

25.12.07

Merry Christmas everyone.....

Ive been waiting..... stalling all week...wording this post over and over in my head.....but it just didn't suit the mood of the season to write this post earlier.... it seemed wrong to be anything other than chirpy.... but I cant hold off any longer...so here goes.....

...some things just take 'us' by surprise....in fact....some things just never happen to 'us'.....they happen to 'other people'.... well thats what I thought... it never entered my head that these things could and would happen to 'me'..... to hear the word 'cancer' used in the same sentence as me was plain nasty.... the blood drained from my body....and my ears froze over. I cant even describe that first 24 hours..... I felt so ill ... I couldn't grasp the news.... my mind literally raced like a movie on fast forward.

...so with just under two weeks to Christmas I was diagnosed with breast cancer......that dreaded lump in my boob wasn't the friendly type at all... and the wait began....always waiting....

I had great plans for Christmas..... I had things running to a tight schedule.....I still needed to shop for gifts....I needed to shop for food....I hadn't mailed a card... hadn't done the annual Christmas letter.....and I still had gifts I wanted to make.....

...the house we are building went into full swing.....the Electrician needed power points planned.... we had cabinets to choose...decisions needed to be made.

..the kids were finishing up school... Briony won an award and we needed to attend the school presentation night.....Mitch began a new job.... lots of happy occasions for the kids....lots of happy faces needed.

I was supposed to be at work.....I was supposed to be having an early Christmas at my place.... I was too busy for this....

but.... it was real....and I had to deal with it.

...so we waited the six days until my appointment in Adelaide with the specialist.... I thought I would almost die from anxiety the morning before my appointment....but I quickly learnt that...this was only the beginning of the waiting...and the anxiety.
I then had to have bone scans... chest x-rays (both clear...phew).... more biopsy's.... more bad news.... there is actually two lumps...not one... and finally this huge wait until January when I go back for my surgery.
It has been huge..... but I feel positive...and very lucky to have had a Doctor who ordered a re-check.... when there was no early indication for it.... I have been told twice now that someone was watching over me....they cant believe the manner in which this was found.....so I have to feel lucky about that.

I have without a doubt the most wonderful Husband ...I cant believe the amount of different ways he has found to lift my spirits....to distract...and entertain me.... he has been my rock...and I love him more and more for that.
I have the best kids in the world.... they were initially shocked and upset as you would imagine... but they have been wonderfully open.... encouraging and humorous.... and made it all so much easier than it could have been.
I am very lucky to have a close family network.... and I also have the best friends (both locally, away and online) and work colleagues in the world... my phone hasn't stopped... the offers of assistance....the shoulders.... the flowers.... I cant thank everyone enough... its very uplifting to get an email..... a phone call... an acknowledgment .... so to all of you....THANKYOU from the bottom of my heart.

...so after a week in Adelaide....Im sent home for Christmas....my surgery is planned.... and Im waiting..... Ian and I managed to finish the Christmas shopping in amongst the appointments.... I whipped up a Christmas letter.... I even made a few more of the gifts I had planned and I got the cards in the mail.
We had a lovely early Christmas with my family here in the weekend....Mum and Dad brought Grandma Lorna up.... we had a delicious traditional lunch.... and a lovely weekend... then today we were all up bright and early..... we opened presents just before 6am..... and I headed off to work.
Brent and Alex left after breakfast for Christmas lunch with Alex's family.....(ohhhh...and I must add....Alex's brother is doing well.....they woke him a few days prior to Christmas....and he has had his hip and ankle plated...it will still be a long recovery...but he is doing ok)
Then Ian, Mitch and Briony came over to my work for lunch. Sue (my work partners wife) cooked a lovely roast lunch and we spent it all together at work......it was a lovely Christmas.... and we all thoroughly enjoyed it.

Well.....thats it for now.... and because I don't have any Christmas photos to share tonight....I'm going to share my layouts from Kims Christmas Extravaganza..... I thoroughly enjoyed every minute of this throughout December.... it was a hoot....thanks Kim.

...so......I hope you have all had the most wonderful magical Christmas days possible.... and I wish you all the very best for year ahead.....
xx

38 comments:

  1. Hi Mardi - i'm one of your blog stalkers - i love your work and love seeing what you create.
    I can't imagine how these last few weeks have been for you - wishing you all the very best - and sending you lots of good healthy vibes ...keep strong
    Merry Christmas

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  2. Anonymous11:41 pm

    Mardi I came to visit your blog to see if there was an update on Alex's brother. Great to hear he is making a recovery. Must be a relief for his family.

    I wish that I lived closer to you so I could be there to give you a BIG friendly hug to show I care.

    I hope you know that there are many people who care about you online and we will be keeping you and your family in our thoughts and prayers over the next few months as you recover.

    I wish I could do something practical to show I care. It is times like this that makes me value my friends even more.

    Please take care of yourself and let me know if I can do anything to help. I know you have the stength needed to get through this situation.

    Lots of love and prayers from Susan (smiles1965) at Scrapboxx.

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  3. Hey there Mardi

    so sorry to hear your news - especially at this time of the year! Stay strong and sending you as many good vibes as I can muster. Merry Christmas to you and your family

    Nikki (Scrapboxx)

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  4. Oh my Mardi... I'm so sorry that you've had all of this to deal with through the holiday season. I'm glad that it sounds like you're getting wonderful care, but I know the waiting is horribly difficult. My mum (and therefore all of us!) has been through cancer and I'm so very thankful for the amazing care she got as well!

    I hope you know there are lots of people thinking of you and your family! Sending lots of healthy vibes to you...

    Merry Christmas...

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  5. Hey Mardi,

    You composed this post very well....I know it wouldn't have been an easy one to do.

    All the very best of the season to you, and 2008 will be filled with all sorts of challenges, but it's nothing that you won't be able to get through. We are here and thinking of you, even if we don't always get a chance to write. Those positive vibes are being sent to you from all over the place.

    Loads of love,
    Megan xx

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  6. Oh Mardi, I don't know what to write, I have tears streaming down my face, I so wish I was there so I could give you a huge big hug.

    I know your beautiful family and friends will give you all the love and support you need to get through this.

    My thoughts are with you Mardi, stay strong.
    Cherie xx

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  7. oh Mardi....my heart has flipped and I am teary....and can't even begin to imagine how you must be feeling at this time.

    I really don't know what to say other than I will be praying hard for you through all of this, and that there are many people who love you dearly and will be there for you constantly....so please, lean on all of them ok.

    Lots of love and prayerful thoughts to you and your family sweetness xx

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  8. Hey there Mardi,

    Wow what a shock! I can't even begin to know what you have been going through. It is fantastic that your doctor followed it up and re checked for you.

    What an awful time of year for you and your family to be coping with this. You have full support of so many people around you and online, take comfort in that through your hard times.

    We are here alway with a friendly listening ear.

    Try and enjoy the rest of the season and take care

    SARAH
    (sassyone scrapboxx)

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  9. Hi there Mardi:)
    You have a huge support network around you and we are here for you every step of the way. Lotsa love Kimxxxx

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  10. Anonymous9:50 am

    Mardi, this was a tough post for you and my heart goes out to you. My prayers and thoughts will be with you and your family through this very hard time which I am positive you will deal with exactly how you have started to deal with it - positively, bravely, optimistically and above all telling all those who care about you so as we can help burden the pain and scariness of it all. You are a wonderful lady and we are all with you while you go on this rollercoaster journey. If you feel down remember to think of all the people sending you the strength and comfort you need. Love always Court & boys xx

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  11. Hi there Mardi.

    I am so sorry to hear your news. I was, still am crying here. I will be thinking of you over the next few months and hope all goes well.

    Mega hugs coming your way Missy. Stay storng.

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  12. I don't know what to say through the tears Mardi...

    Please know that I am thinking of you, and sending positive vibes.

    You have such a wonderful support network, draw on their strength to help you stay strong.

    Love to you and your family.
    xMichelle

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  13. Hi Mardi!

    I've been thinking of you constantly since you told me the news... wondering how you are...worrying about you and what you are going through... but I know you have an amazing family there for you giving you all the strength and comfort that they possible can. We are all here for you too, sending you our very best wishes and prayers... I'm so glad you managed to have a lovely Christmas with family in the middle of all this....

    Sending you lots of positive vibes and BIG (((((HUGS))))... stay strong!!

    Sheree xx

    PS. So glad to hear Alex's brother is doing well!

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  14. Hi Mardi,
    Always here checking out your blog.
    I just don't know what to say other then stay strong girl.
    Know that there are so many out there that will be praying for you all at this time.
    All the best
    xoxo

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  15. Hey Mardi.
    I have thought of you each day since I found out the news and I just know that everything is going to be fine! You are so strong and are such a fighter my thoughts are constantly with you!
    What a hard few weeks you have had Mardi, i just can't imagine it.
    I am ALWAYS here if you need me. For a shoulder to cry on or a ear to chatter too...just call if you need me!
    I will give you a call in the next couple of days to see if there is anything around the house that i can do while your away. I would LOVE to help out in some way, even if it's watering the plants or something boring like that...lol!
    Take care Mardi...luv you lots!
    Belinda
    xxx

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  16. Mardi, I know what a bolt out of the blue this was for you. My thoughts were with you and your family over Christmas, and will be with you over the coming weeks. My offer stands... Anything I can do, just holler.

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  17. Mardi, I am so sorry to hear your news. Sadly I know exactly what you are going through. As hard as it is, stay positive and focused and just deal with things one day at a time. I will email you my phone number. If you ever want to chat please ring.

    If you need anything, please let me know. Big hugs.

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  18. Anonymous4:06 pm

    hi Mardi
    you know i join with everyone in saying how shocked i am to hear your news, but you know that along wth your wonderful family you have a group of online friends that will be willing you along every step of the way. All the best for the challenges ahead of you, and its great to hear that you got to have christmas lunch while you were at work:)
    as always
    cheers
    Jane
    (fitchett)

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  19. Hi Mardi, I too stalk your blog and love looking at your amazing layouts. I am sending you loads of hugs, good thoughts and prayers for the year of 2008. Good luck and stay strong. Lyn xoxo

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  20. Mardi - Wow,I'm speachless. All I can say is I'm sending your tons of hugs, love and prayers. It was a beautifully written post.
    Paula :)

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  21. Oh Mardi, I can't even begin to imagine the emotions you must be feeling right now. I'm sending positive thoughts and prayers your way. God bless and good luck in the weeks to come.

    Many, many hugs
    LynetteXX

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  22. Mardi,
    You are in my thoughts and I wish you all the very best for January and a speedy remission!
    Love Tara x (tarzy-the box)

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  23. Oh Mardi...I can't even imagine how you would be feeling...you are unique,strong,loyal,amazing... and you ROCK! My prayers and thoughts are with you always.I'm here too if you need anything... and I mean anything day or night...You have the most amazing family and friends.. you are so LOVED mardi by us all... you always touch the hearts of others and it's our turn to touch yours...x x x leeann (boxx-rocker)

    BTY... loved loved you lo's and gifts on the kim-A-workshops... you totally rock....

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  24. Oh my goodness Mardi! I hope it all turns out for the best... I can't imagine how worried you are.

    I hope you and your family have a great 2008!

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  25. Anonymous12:42 pm

    Hi Mardi

    You know my prayers are with you all, stay strong and lean on all your wonderful supportive family and friends...I KNOW you WILL win this

    Take care

    JULIEx

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  26. Carol-lea3:48 pm

    Mardi, I have been meaning to drop by to congratulate you on Masters...so I am deeply shocked to read of your news. I have a lump in my throat thinking of how awful this is for you and your family. I am praying hard that everything works out OK for you, and just remember that when you are feeling down, there are heaps of us here that you can lean on. Sendng you huge hugs, and crossing my fingers that 2008 brings more positive news for you!!

    Carol-lea xx

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  27. ngaire bartlam4:12 pm

    HI Mardi.
    Just a small note to let you know that i too am thinking of you and am doing my very best to send all the most positive healing thoughts your way.

    Stay strong believe in yourself and the power you hold within to heal and get past the bitch that is breast cancer.

    be well and happy in 2008 and far far beyond.

    peace.

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  28. My special friend. That must have been hard to share (not that ANY aspect of this must be easy). You are so lucky to have such a wonderful family and so many people who love you and want to be there for you. You really are a very special girl. I am praying for you with all my heart.

    all my love Yvette xoxoxo

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  29. Rach Wyndham9:14 pm

    No matter how many times I start this I cant find the words I want to say - but what is obvious is that we are all sending strength, support and prayers for you since we cant be there with you.

    Mardi I will keep you in my thoughts and I look forward to hearing your good news when you are given the all clear!

    Many hugs and much love
    Rachie
    xxxx

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  30. Mardi, You did an amazing blog to document this low point in your life - I was sobbing as I read it -but you know I think of you every single day and wish I was closer so we could share a cuppa, chat and a hug. This will all turn out ok - you are strong and you can do anything - you will have your surgery and treatment and then put this all behind you and get back to life as normal. Love you heaps. Donna :-)

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  31. Mardi, we are all here for you, stay strong and think positive. Please lean on all of us, your scrapping buddies - we are here for you.
    Hugs.

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  32. Mardi,

    Its with tears that I reply to your post. I don't think I can even find the right words to post right now. Thinking of you and wish you all the very best.

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  33. Oh Mardi... holy sh!t... words fail me right now, mate... what a shock - even more of a shock for you and your family.

    Stay positive, mate - and know that you have the support of LOADS of us here in cyber-land - sending you lots of love, hugs, positive vibes and well-wishes.

    Take care of yourself
    Ali xoxoxo

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  34. Oh Mardi, I've just finished crying and started again reading others posts.

    I am ready to quit my job and fly over to be with you... just say the word.

    BIG HUGS,

    Jen

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  35. Anonymous6:45 pm

    Hey Josie you gorgeous girl (havent called you that for a long time LOL!!!) You know that big cuddle i owed you when i first met you, well you have plenty of them coming your way.

    You and Your family are in my heart and thoughts Mardi.

    Love Jodes
    xx

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  36. Hi Mardi,
    So sorry to hear your news...I will be keeping you in my prayers and sending you positive thoughts your way.
    Take Care
    xBec

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  37. Oh Mardi, we're still away at the moment but I've finally had a chance to jump online ... and I was SOOO sorry to read about your news. Know that you are in my thoughts and prayers though and I am sending out every wish for a full and speedy recovery. Much love. xxx

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  38. Stay strong Mardi... thinking of you.

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